Solitude has a bad rep.
She’s just saying that to make herself feel better about being friendless.
Alarmed or Pitying looks are thrown your way when you tell them that you plan to be on your own this weekend.
At work, I used to feel self-conscious when people saw me on my own at break times. I used to imagine that they were thinking all sorts of unpleasantries…
She must be weird… She has no friends… She has no friends; therefore, she must be weird.
I work at a school, and instead of heading to the staff room at break and lunch times, I used to sit outside the classroom I worked in. I enjoyed this rare moment I had to myself without the children, the teachers, the noise, but because I felt too self-conscious sitting there, all alone; I forced myself to go into the staffroom.
The enjoyment I had once had sitting on my own vanished, and instead I was surrounded by gossip and inane conversation, which can be jolly good at times but wasn’t what I wanted to do on my break.
I’m an introvert and I like having some time to myself. It’s the time I would recharge my batteries, if I had any. It’s where I regain my energy.
There is a lot of good to be said about solitude. It’s just that it isn’t often said, or at least not very loudly.
During my solitary periods, I discover more things about myself. After all, who doesn’t want an excuse to spend more time thinking about themselves? It’s not as if we already think that the whole world evolves around us.
Nonetheless, through these solitary periods, I get to understand myself better— feel more comfortable with oneself.
You can also think about your goals in life, whether you’re achieving them, whether you need to set new ones, whether you need to have any goals at all…
It gives you time to think through complex issues. It allows you to figure out how you are going to approach them.
Instead of doing this: react first. Grovel later.
You get to do this: think first. React later.
Or you could use your time on your own to not think about anything at all…
Of course, I’d be lying if I said solitude was always a blast. It isn’t. Especially if it’s unwanted. You can feel miserable and angry and lonely and frustrated, but you could feel all of those emotions and more even if you went out every night and had a million and two friends hanging onto your every syllable.
And I’m not claiming that solitude works for everyone.
It’s the only thing I wouldn’t generalise on… but it could work for you.
Some people hate solitude, and wish they could be anywhere else but with themselves.
I just happen to like it, most of the time.
And if something is good most of the time…
What do you think?
Did you like the article? Follow, the blog and you’ll never miss a post.