Without going into details— I know, you’ve found one, a millennial who doesn’t want to go into details— I am experiencing some big changes at the moment.
And although these changes are for the better, I feel anxious about them. I’ve always found change hard. Many people do, so I thought I’d write a blog post looking at some of the reasons why change can be a difficult thing.
When you’re uncertain
Sometimes you know a change is needed. You’re stuck in a rut. Relationship. Job. And you know that you need to do something about it.
Some of the ideas you come up with will be no go areas, but some will have promise, and those are the ones that can fill your mind with dread for many hours.
What if I’m not capable? What if I get it wrong? What if I end up in an even worse position?
What if my life does get better and I don’t like that it has?! (I know, the mind works in infuriatingly mysterious ways…)
When it’s unexpected
No, I’m not, but what if your significant other one day came over to you whilst you were enjoying a solitary tea for two and let you know that she was pregnant. You weren’t trying for a baby. You had discussed it, but you hadn’t been planning on becoming parents any time soon.
What do you do?
You’re happy because you will be bringing a life into this world, but what about money? We don’t have enough. And what about a house? We can’t afford one. And my career! I don’t have one. Will I have time to start one before the bouncing bundle of joy arrives?
When it’s tough
Sometimes the change you need will require a lot of work. Perhaps it’ll mean that you’ll have to forgo your evenings out to the theatre or the like. Maybe it’ll mean really early mornings and extremely late nights for the next two months.
Perhaps it’ll mean learning something that is tedious and difficult in equal measure.
When change requires a lot of work, sometimes we don’t bother making that change. We don’t think we have it in us to do it. We procrastinate. We think of all the real and imagined reasons for why we cant do it. And so we don’t.
When you don’t want to change
Life is good. You know you can’t stay at your parent’s house forever, but it’s so much easier here.
You can plan your next career move without having to worry about paying bills or cooking your own meals.
But you’ve been given this opportunity? And it requires not only that you move out but also that you move to the other side of the world. You could bring your parents along for the ride, but is that the right thing to do?
Change is difficult, but most things are reversible. And if you can’t reverse it, then, well, at least you won’t go on wondering what if anymore. Plus, hair grows back.
More quickly in some places than others.